4:30pm. I heard the door swung open followed by the familiar footsteps. A head popped in, still wet from the swimming, then the lean and tanned frame. He was checking in, knowing that I would be home waiting for him for the big event of the day: his job interview. How was the swim? Good. Did you have a good day? Another good. His face all bronze up after months of patrolling up and down the streets around town revealed the same calmness and assured me that he had little anxiety about the interview at 6pm. We went through another iteration of reminder on music and manners, then it was time to change and pack up to go.
The interview was for a church accompanist – this would be his 2nd try. I have to admit this too, like the first one and his many other competitions or auditions, does little to me as far as any expectation was concerned. Rejection has been a theme of our life and we have grown accustomed to it for different reasons. His teacher, on the other hand, had been all antsy, hopeful, excited. She even rescheduled the class to work with him on his prepared piece.
5:45 only and we were at the parking lot of the church already. My son in his polo shirt and khaki pants looked as untouched as his clean shaven face. There locked inside of those dark brown eyes was the envy of all envies: a pool of serenity so far-fetched and longed by the rest of us. That brief moment inside of our car with our short prayer and the light oldies rocking on the radio was a taste of the ultimate solace. How I wished then that we could stay here forever! My son, my Jesus and His love – there is nothing sweeter and fairer.
We walked out of car and into the church. 10 minutes later, the panel of search committee all arrived. Luke sat with his back straight and purposeful attention – he was practicing every single rule I had drilled earlier. No matter, the verbal interview was not going far, which I had already pre-warned them on the phone. His interviewers then took it to the next stage. It was time to play his piece.
The sanctuary looked moderate in size and adornment, except for the pine paneled cathedral ceilings with 2 rows of clean lined chandeliers hanging down. It was a day of high 90’s and the air conditioning was not fully functioning. Our hosts apologized for the discomfort. I was mildly worried for Luke’s sake, wondering if he was going to be able to play well under the heat. He did fine. It was no Beethoven sonata or Bach concerto after all. The real challenge came when he was given pieces of brand new music for sight reading. My initial worry, though slight, proved to be extraneous as he played on carefully with deliberated articulation. Every once in a while, I would see from the corner of my eyes the others exchanging looks with smile and nods. They too appeared to like what they witnessed. A couple of times when they gave him directions he didn’t understand, after they demonstrated it on the piano briefly, he would pick it up and finish the task almost flawlessly. It surprised not only his panel of judged but also me. Music is his language; I already knew that, I just didn’t expect the extent of his proficiency. It was close to 7 o’clock on a late June summer day. The sun was still glaring bright and high outside of the beautiful windows along with its unyielding heat. Oblivious of both nature’s imposition and men’s inquisition, my son on the podium played on unwaveringly. And there I sat on a pew just a few feet away, my heart full and yet my words lost. It was a duet of 2 souls - the mother and son - singing the hymn "Blessed Assurance" with total abandonment then and there. I was musing how appropriate though cliché to feel touched by heaven at a place like a church when I was awe struck not by what Luke was capable but what God was capable. All along music had always been there, but music was not the theme.
An hour later, after being thoroughly examined from piano, keyboard and then organ, the interview finally concluded. We headed out, leaving the decision or consequence behind us, along with any anxiety I might have. I longed to be back into the car, even for as little as 10 minutes with the cool air conditioning and yes the safe haven free from all doubts and care. We were driving home, but to me, it might as well be a prequel of the ride to heaven.